Results day can be daunting for everyone. And there’s nothing like that sinking feeling when things don’t turn out as you’d hoped.
If your teen has had their confidence knocked, it’s helpful to remind them that there’s always a plan b (and c, d, e and f!) and that you’re there for them to help them overcome all the challenges that life might throw their way.
Here are 15 steps you can take to support your teen when results day doesn’t go to plan. Plus, our tutors share their own experiences and learnings.
1. Reassure them
Remind them that no matter what results they got, you’re proud of them for the work they put in.
Yes, it might feel like their world has been turned upside down, but exam results are just one thing out of lots of other types of achievements. They don’t need to pin their whole self-worth on grades.
“These things happen. Not getting the results you want doesn’t take away from you as a person or your hard work,” says Eleanor, an English, History and Psychology tutor at MyTutor. “It can feel really scary not to have the results you wanted, but you won’t feel like this forever.”
2. Speak with teachers and ask for support
“When results day doesn’t go to plan, talk with their teachers and college admissions team,’ suggests Tahidur, a Maths and Science tutor at MyTutor. “Don’t try and solve and handle everything on your own. There are people there to help you out.”
3. Work it out together
Your teen might want some space, they might just want to hang out with friends, or they might want to vent to you. Try to give them whatever they need after results day, but remind them that you’re there to help them work out the next step – whenever they need.
4. Check if they can get any papers re-marked
If your teen gets results that were way off their predicted grades, or if they missed a higher grade by just a couple of marks, you can send their paper to be re-marked. The best thing to do is talk to their teacher who can help them make the decision.
5. Consider resits
If their heart is set on a particular university course or if they need particular grades for their chosen career path, it might be worth considering resitting.
GCSE resits take place in November, and A-Level resits happen next summer (along with all the other A-Level exams).
Either way, talk to them about their options and chat with their subject teacher for their advice.
6. Think about working with a tutor
Whether they’ve just done their GCSEs and are looking ahead to A-Levels or they’re considering doing resits, a MyTutor tutor can help. They can focus specifically on knowledge gaps or help your teen to prepare for specific exams.
Our tutors are close in age to your teen and will remember the emotional rollercoaster of results day well. So, they can really help to boost your teen’s confidence if they’re left feeling disappointed or doubting themselves.
7. Help them re-angle ‘failure’
“I faced the disappointment of not achieving my expected grade in GCSE Maths,” says Alice, a Psychology and Sociology tutor at MyTutor. “This setback became a catalyst for growth, motivating me to work harder.
“Over time, I learned to embrace setbacks as opportunities for self-improvement and resilience, ultimately using the experience to fuel my determination in pursuing my future goals.”
If they didn’t get the GCSE results they wanted…
9. Focus on strengths
“While one subject might not have gone as planned, help them to remember their strengths in other areas,” says Alice. “Celebrate their successes and help your teen think about how they can leverage those strengths when choosing A-Levels or taking the next step.”
10. Help them pause and reflect
“Without piling on the pressure, help them think about why they didn’t get the results they wanted. Allow them to take a moment to reflect on all the options available to them and which one they want most – not just what people want for them,” says Rose a Physics, Maths and Chemistry tutor at MyTutor.
“You could also help your teen look at other colleges or sixth forms to see if they have any last-minute places if they didn’t get the grades for their first choice.”
11. Remember the bigger picture
“GSCEs aren’t going to be important to them in years to come, focus on what they want their next steps to be and how they’re going to get there,” says Emily, a Physics and Maths tutor at MyTutor.
“There are also loads of other things they can do besides A-Levels, that put you in really good stead for your future,” suggests Alfie, a History, Geography and Politics tutor at MyTutor. “So keep your eye out for loads of other great options, like apprenticeships.”
If they didn’t get the A-Level results they wanted…
12. Speak to their university
“I didn’t get the grades I was predicted, but it didn’t have a huge impact. Universities can be flexible and it’s always worth ringing and speaking to them if you don’t get in,” says Katie a French and Sociology tutor at MyTutor.
13. Consider UCAS Clearing
“Don’t panic when results day doesn’t go to plan. Check your scores and see if a remark is a viable option. Check the Clearing options from different universities and see if there’s a course that still feels right for you,” says Tahidur.
“It’s obviously not ideal, but sometimes the best things are those that are unexpected. Your teen might find a course that fits them better than their original choice or a uni that’s the right one for them.”
14. Think about all the options
“If their initial plans don’t work out, your teen could consider apprenticeships, vocational courses, or gap year opportunities. These paths can provide valuable experiences and skills,” says Alice.
Lots of people also take a year out after A-Levels. It can be a helpful thing to do to get some perspective and really think about what they want to do and achieve.
15. Have hope
“Although I wasn’t able to get into my first choice University I still managed to get into my backup and had a great university experience working with incredible professors and meeting some great people along the way,” says Tahidur.
“I managed to get a first in my degree as I used the feeling of disappointment on A-level results day as motivation for something I didn’t want to feel again.”
“Remember, setbacks are a natural part of life – even when results day doesn’t go to plan. What matters most is how you respond to them,” says Alice. “Keep an open mind and be willing to adapt your plans to create a positive path forward!”
Think your teen might benefit from a tutor? Find the right one for them here.